There is nothing quite like the feeling of waking up in the morning with a brand new, sparkly diamond ring sitting on my left hand. Along with the change from “girlfriend” to “fiancé”, this new bling has been distracting to say the least. Grocery shopping, note taking and laundry are suddenly a little more exciting, and dreams about our future have started to become reality.
With each flash of my hand, I’m reminded of my decision to commit my life to the person I love.
I’m also reminded of the wedding planning that will ensue.
As someone who loves all things Style Me Pretty and spends more time on Pinterest than the average person should, the reality of planning a wedding feels like a dream a come true to me. But the focus of the day can be so quickly lost in the invitations, tulle, and vendor lists.
It’s so easy to trade in the joy of a soon-to-be covenant for dissatisfied coveting.
The centerpieces have to be prettier than the ones on my Pinterest boards. The venue has to be more memorable than the ones in the bridal magazines. The food has to be the most drool worthy, and I better be “the most beautiful bride you’ve ever seen”.
When did society decide it’s more important to plan a beautiful wedding than a beautiful marriage? Why have we chosen to spend engagements strung out, emotionally and financially, only for the day to pass by and leave behind two worn-out newlyweds?
Don’t get me wrong—I’m all for beautiful weddings. I look forward to signing the dotted line on the perfect venue contract and saying “yes to the dress” with my lovely bridesmaids-to-be. However, I refuse to spend the next year and a half of Jared and I’s lives focused on a day that will pass as quickly as it comes.
I want to start life with my someday husband feeling encouraged and prepared after a year and a half of intentional prayer, hard conversations and messy soul-searching. I want to spend more time ironing out the kinks of living life up-close than worrying about the “one thing” that I’ve heard will likely go wrong on our wedding day. I pray that we would spend this exciting season of engagement focused on preparing for a God-honouring marriage rather than simply designing a wedding that ends up in a magazine spread.
To those who are sharing in the joy of being newly engaged this holiday season, let’s not lose our focus in the mix of post-engagement to-do lists and wedding shows.
Wedding planning will inevitably be a major part of the engagement season—so, let’s plan our wedding day, and let’s make it beautiful. But let’s not forget to prepare for the beautiful gift of marriage that will come with it.